I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize