Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Randomize
