He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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