Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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