elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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