Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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