You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
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