So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
