turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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