Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
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