I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Randomize
