I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I need moral support for this bender
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
