The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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