You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Randomize