why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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