She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
