I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
he was CRYING into my vagina
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
