Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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