Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
