Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Randomize
