On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
My sheets look like a crime scene.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
my liver is dry heaving
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
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