Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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