so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
