So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Randomize
