i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
17 year olds will be the death of me.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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