eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
I'm really busy with my period
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