...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I have feelings that need drinking.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
