Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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