There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
