Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
