i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
