im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
