Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Randomize
