he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
My liver just had a heart attack.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
