3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
