Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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