Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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