Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
