I wish you could order shots online.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
