Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
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