Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Randomize
