how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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