We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
