Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
