dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
