I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
