in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
