So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
