I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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