Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
